Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Utah Grief Counselors

Utah-based grief counselors were asked how to best deal with losing someone you love. This is a brief compilation of some of their responses.

Accept The Way You Feel

“Once we can accept that the pain of loss is a natural hurt based on our love, it's not just a meaningless pain. Grief is a deeply meaningful experience, that shows us how we feel about those we love.”

-Ammon Fawson, LMFT

“...accept your feelings.  All the pain, sadness, and anger is there whether you like it or not.  Ignoring it won't make it go away.  You don't have to feel them all at once or all the time, but avoiding your feelings only prolongs the grieving process.”

-Dr. Stephen Thayer

“Acknowledge how mourning changes as time goes on. This plays out when we come to a natural point in time when, we don’t forget them but we feel it’s time to put their personal belongings away and begin to choose when and where to remember. This should feel natural and healing, not forced.”

-Lorii Hubbard

Know That It Will Take Time

“There's no time table for grief. There's no "it's been one year, you should be better now". There are so many myths that need to be challenged. No one experiences grief the same way, and no one does it wrong.”

-Aimee Francom

“There is no set time for you to be ‘over it.’  And don't expect to get over it. The loss will stay with you; but over time and as part of  your grief journey, you will learn to live with it, incorporate it into your changed life.”

-Lothair W. Pendleton, LCSW

“But really - the best advice I can give you is to know that it will take time, to be gentle on yourself, and to allow yourself to grieve.”

-Liz Hunter, MA, LMFTA

Find Others Who Listen and Understand

“First, get support.  Turn to friends and family and accept the support they offer.  It's okay to take time for yourself, you'll likely need it.  Just don't isolate yourself or push people away.”

-Dr. Stephen Thayer

“Finding those who will just listen - and listen without judgement or advice - is very important.”

-Lothair W. Pendleton

“Support groups can also be very helpful. Many hospitals and psychotherapists offer support groups for those dealing with sudden and traumatic loss. There are also online groups which can help. I found a support group about six months after the death of my husband which I attended monthly for three years. Knowing that I wasn’t the only one in my position helped immeasurably.”

-Liz Hunter, MA, LMFTA

For more information go to: Dealing with Loss - Christensen & Hymas
Article written:Christensen & Hymas - the Utah Accident Lawyers

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